As a teenager from Lebanon, the United States of America always sounded as the place of miracles. The place where dreams came true. The place where everything was possible, The place where everyone was even and equally treated. I used to constantly watch these American high school movies and fancied how they lived, I fancied every single detail of their lives from the independence they had to the prom they went to. It all seemed tempting and exciting but it never occurred to me that I might get the chance of living there and experiencing all that and much more.
It all started back in 9th grade when the principle and the English language teacher paid a visit to our class. They came to explain to us about this great opportunity where we get to go the States for a school year and live with an American family. The program was the YES program (Youth Exchange and Study program) where they granted 9th and 10th graders from across the Arab and Muslim world a full scholarship and all paid costs in addition to a monthly allowance for the student. It was founded by the American government after the events of September 11 in a try to prove to Americans that not all Arabs and Muslims are terrorists and at the same time to teach Arabians about the true American culture; not only what they see in the movies or the news. As the teacher went on explaining the details and encouraging us to apply saying that this is a lifetime opportunity and besides all the fun and cultural benefits, this would open us great doors to the future. Needless to say that the class was very excited and you could see the sparkle in the students' eyes especially those who dreamed about traveling there. As for me though, the idea never clicked in my head. I was too busy studying and preparing for the official exams at the end of the school year. I always knew what I wanted and planned accordingly. I was working on getting my straight A's and getting a high honors on my exams for it was a big deal for me and my parents. So at the time the idea seemed out of my interest list for I wanted to keep focused on my goal. The teachers tried to convince me to apply for I was perfect fit for this with my academic history and my fluent English. I have to admit I did like it in a way but not enough to apply.
I got home after a long day at school and my mom was in the kitchen preparing lunch, my youngest uncle was there too. I helped my mom set up the table and I decided to tell her about what happened at school. I wasn't sure how to start this conversation for I wasn't sure myself why I was about to tell her when I didn't even plan on applying! So I went and told her straight. I told her all about the scholarship. She looked at me and told me what I knew she was going to say. She said that I was still too young to travel anywhere by myself. She said that I still have a long way to go in life and do what I want, maybe go to college there but as for now the answer is no. I told her that I wasn't even planing on applying and I just told her that for no specific reason. We sat down for lunch but my dad wasn't home yet, he was running late at work that day.
After lunch, I did my prayers and went to do my homework. When dad arrived, my mom put him dinner and they ate together. I went and sat next to him while he smoke his cigarette ; I knew he was in a good mood form the way he sat. I started to talk but for some reason I babbled at first! So, I took a breath and told him that I had something to say to him. I told him that I know how you and mom want to keep updated with what's going on in our school. He nodded in approval. I started to say that I knew he was going to reject the idea and that I was 99% sure he won't approve of such thing but I just wanted to tell him. I told him all the details and explained to him about the YES program when he looked up at me and said the unexpected. "Go ahead and apply." ! I was shocked for I did not see that coming and neither was my mom. At first I thought he was jocking or mocking me but it turned out he was dead serious about it. He said again and clearly "I am not playing around, go ahead and apply." I was surprised and had mixed feelings. I was happy that I might get a chance to see the world outside my country yet I was scared to be rejected. I have never been rejected before; always getting what I want and reaching my goals so what if I don't get in?!
That night I wasn't able to sleep for several reasons. One of which was the sound of parents talking in their room about this idea. My dad wanted me to apply so that he knows where my English level was ; if the private school was worth all the money he was paying. My mom however was worried about the idea that her 15 year old will be traveling across the globe by herself to live with strangers away from her family. I think the main reason why I didn't sleep was because of all the crazy thoughts I had running in my head. If I apply will they accept me? I mean over 1200 students apply from all over Lebanon and only 45 make the cut so what are the odds that I'll be one of those 45? And besides, is my English really that good? Like good enough to get me a scholarship to the states? And IF I went will my host family love and accept me for who I am? How will I survive in a society that I knew relatively nothing about? What about my official exams? Will I have the ability to balance my time between everything? ... I was so confused but somehow managed to get some sleep.
The next day the teachers were glad that I decided to apply and they all supported me. Once I got my application my journey started. Application after application, exam after exam, interview after interview till I finally made it and I was in the chosen 45.
Eventually, I got both of my YES scholarship and my high honors in the official exam. It was a busy year between my preparation for the year abroad with all the conferences we had to attend and orientations and between the official exams but I am happy to say that it was a success year. Now that I look back to 2008 it puts a smile on my face knowing that people believed in me and that once we put our mind to something we can pull it through all it takes is courage, determination and of course hard work.
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